Sat Feb 8, 2020

So today my husband and I went to eat lunch together and then went shopping-
The main part of this was the ability to FINALLY get my meds. I turned in my prescription on Wednesday and they couldn't read his handwriting so they kept calling the doctor over and over again and they were getting no response, so I then started calling them over and over.
eventually at some time late last night, someone called the pharmacy and finally told them what my prescription said so i could finally get my medicine today--- 4 days later.

we are still waiting for the doctor to fight it out with the insurance company to try an get me the medicine i need, but they have also prepared us for worst case scenario and given me a prescription of an alternative medicine that is supposed to be similar. but i'm not supposed to take it unless i run out of the samples they gave me and the appeal to the insurance company fails.

its just a whole lotta stuff that makes me all kinds of angry because when doctors and stuff get complicated my brain shuts down from the anxiety. i can't process what happens, so thankfully my husband is usually there to help me.

Today I got home from town and just wanna do stuff--- i'm reorganizing little things that don't matter to anybody but me and for some reason I started playing minecraft again.

Im just trying to make it to the therapy-- which is Tuesday if she doesn't cancel again. She was sick last time and if its the flu idek how long she might be out. I just really dont know what to do with myself, I'm trying to do house work and be productive but it feels so empty and getting up the nerve to do it is hard. like what... i dont know if its depression or anxiety or both but sometimes I just cannot get up and do shit.

I've been making chains of beads while I watch movies or tv, so thats good. keeps me from wanting to eat all day while i'm watching stuff lol.

we are keeping our friend's baby this week-- my mom and dad are and we help a lot. so that is the most fun thing. but it only happened every two weeks and then we dont see her again for two weeks.
so its kind of a yay time
followed by a "wat am i doing with my life this sucks" time

so i guess that's about it for now