Tuesday August 31, 2021

 So this is a particularly hard time of year for me, and my family.

August 28  was the death anniversary of my nana's passing (four years ago now)

And then Sept 5th, will be one year since pawpaw died last year.

And this week we are doing quite a bit. I am going to try to make myself think of these things as a DISTRACTION from the bad feels and rather not.... a burden to bear on top of them.

On friday we are meeting old friends in town for dinner. And saturday is football game day-- so obviously there will be a cookout.

My husband and I will move our grocery shopping to Sunday morning because doing it on saturday morning would be horrible given all the people who will be buying stuff for their own saturday football cookouts.

And then the little girl we baby sit will be coming sunday afternoon.

But all I can seem to focus on is death and my grandparents being gone.

I'm sleeping a lot, crying, I'm either eating too much or not enough--- the usual I guess.

As of today I have been logging my calories for 100 days in a row!!!!! Whether I over ate or under ate ... I logged my calories for 100 days straight.