Wednesday March 30, 2022

 Last week started with my husband getting what we thought was food poisoning, so I took care of him and doted over him. but by wednesday it was clear that it was not food poisoning because I, too, got sick.

it was a stomach flu or something.

I didn't vomit a lot bit I did a lot of other things (poop)

And the pain.... my legs were aching. the muscles were hurting, it felt like they were being pulled from the bones it hurt so bad.

On monday my husband somehow managed to pull off a job from home while he was sick and it went really well, and in retrospect... he has actually little to no memory of it happening.

Lately I've been watching the second season of Bridgerton, Minx, and The Dropout on Hulu.

my husband and I finished season one of Gilded Age on HBO and we both love it. It's by the people who did Downton Abbey.

My cousin's daughter is in the hospital and she is very very sick. We all have been praying and she isnt getting any better and they arent making any headway either.

I miss my dad more than I thought I would. The other night I was crying about it and my husband messaged my mom and had my dad call me. I didn't have much to say and i was stuffy from crying and it was a horrible but also much needed phone call.

To top that, my car's check engine light has come on and before now the only person allowed to work on my cars has been my dad and now, he can't. so i'm...i dont know it just bring up a lot of feels. like i'm losing him even more.

monday march 14, 2022

 Well Last week I was on FIRE. House wife of the year.

this past weekend not so much.

I just laid in bed. 

My wonderful husband cooked and washed dishes. I think I just burnt myself out trying so hard to be perfect last week. I woke up and did make up and chores and errands and tried to be perky all the time and let me tell you, its exhausting.

Am i allowed some down time where all i wanna do is lay in bed? does that mean i'm back stepping on my mental health recovery? i sure hope not because i need that down time or i will lose my mind.

i'm dragging my feet on finding a therapist. the last lady i called actually called back and told me she was over loaded with clients and couldn't take me but told me a website to go to. she said they don't do phone call stuff, that everything is online. which is kinda weird for me. idk. you think i'd be ok with that haha

so i guess after this, i will hop on that website and see what's up with that. she said its what she was part of and there's quite a few therapists on there.

i kept up with my self care routine last week really good too. but over the weekend i didn't. but usually i'm all wash face in morning, spf moisturizer, make up (if i wear it), at night i wash my face take my make up off (even my eye make up) use my night time moisturizer. also i have an eye cream now! am i old yet!? lol